I'm Missing Something

We've hit that time of year again. For us, the real money drain always starts about now -- shortly before Pumpkin's birthday. We've stretched out the tax refund as far as we could (it would have gone farther if not for the plumbing troubles that still aren't fixed) and something abruptly changes at Hubby's work (just like last year). For the curious, he's going to days, which means a lower hourly rate and his location has changed back to Irvine, which is a long drive. We looked at our budget and the new income less the cost of Hubby's commute, then we gasped and realized that it's going to be a struggle. Last October, we had the additional stress of an accident that added a car payment to the load and a dental bill that's crazy huge and must be paid in installments. If the settlement from that accident ever comes through things might get better. I'm afraid to hope.

So here's the thing. We don't buy alcohol: no beer, no wine, no wine coolers, no zima or whatever is the current craze. Neither of us smoke. We don't go out: no date night, no movies, no beer after work with the buds. We rarely eat out. I don't get manicures, pedicures, or even have my hair cut -- I cut it myself with sewing scissors. I also trim Hubby's hair and the boys' hair. We haven't taken a vacation in a very long time. We don't have the dog shaved or fluffed. Our car is washed in our driveway. House maintenance is done by us or just gets put off out of desperation. I don't even spend money on make-up, and Hubby and I use the same shampoo, soap and toothpaste. We do have some challenging diets that can be expensive. And I'm sure the $250 electric bill I just paid did not help any.  But there are plenty of people around us who make less and do all these things. How?

I don't get it. We carefully budget. We do what we can to pay our bills. We do have some credit card debt, but it's not nearly as bad as the national average. Our house payment here is less than at our old house, though I admit it would still make my mom's mouth drop open.  The car payment is $156 a month. That's really not awful, particularly when so many of the people I'm thinking about have car payments in the three-hundred range. What are we doing wrong? How do these people do all these things: go places, have vacations in cool places or have weekend barbecues with all their friends over? How do they afford to have their hair cut at $20 a pop or more? How? What am I missing?